Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Easing Back Into Sugar

I have now been sugar-free for almost 4 months. It's only 6 weeks until we go to Europe and when we get there I don't want to be chained to my sugar-free convictions because there will be so many amazing new foods to try. Some of these might be once in a lifetime opportunities, for example Sfogliatelle. Sfogliatelle is fairly unique to Naples, Italy. Although you can find it elsewhere it differs region to region, and be damned if I'm not going to try the real thing.

It's a daunting thought, easing back into sugar, because I know how easy it will be to give myself an inch and take a mile. I don't want to end up back where I started, slowly killing myself with the most easily available refined white substance in the world. Easter weekend was an easy place to start. My Mum bought me an Easter Egg but also a box of Jarrah White Hot Chocolate. Jarrah is within my 3% sugar allowance and it is so good when you just need a sugar fix. I gave her back the egg and kept the Jarrah.
I was so proud of myself for passing up the Easter Egg but then over the weekend I ate 3 Cadbury Creme Eggs, 3 Hershey's Kisses, a bottle of V and a small bowl of Chocolate Mousse. On the other hand when I went to the supermarket on Monday I walked straight past the 50% off Easter Eggs. I need to continue consciously making good decisions for myself.

Can I still call myself Sugar-Free? Probably not. I hated when I bought the V (on the way to a gig, at which I drank nothing but a sugar-free Vodka and Diet Coke) and our friend asked "Wait, aren't you sugar-free?". Courtney does it too, if I have a treat on occasion (I have always allowed myself one a week) he will say "Oh, that must be sugar-free dessert", knowing full well it's not. I know he's joking and I shouldn't take it to heart, but I've tried really hard for the last 4 months to really turn my health around and I don't want to feel guilty when I treat myself that once.

I'm still a little hesitant to allow myself this easing of rules. After the creme eggs, I realised I just don't love chocolate the way I used to think I did. Of course I like the taste, but the main reason for eating it is probably more a need for sugar rather than a want for the taste. I hope I can focus on eating things for taste, not sugar as I ease away from the strict rules of the last 4 months.

I do not want to go back to Milos for breakfast and Chocolate for afternoon tea. It's not necessary. It's not about a new experience. It's not about a special occasion. It's about addiction, and I will not be a slave to it anymore.

Have you ever eased back into 'normal' life from a diet or eating plan? How do you keep an inch and leave the mile alone?